Issue: March 2010


On the Town - Indianapolis

A GUY’S GUIDE TO INDIANAPOLIS

HOW TO SPEND A MACHO DAY IN CIRCLE CITY

BY JOHN SCHWARB
ILLUSTRATIONS BY JASON RAISH

No city can boast as many prime steakhouses in as small an area as Indy, which has eight such alpha-male restaurants within about six city blocks. Stepping out of Red’s into a brisk day, one can go east, west or south to a steak.

Fogo de Chão Churrascaria is a Brazilian all-you-can-eat palace where servers dressed as gauchos bring skewered meats to your table until you cry mercy. Other national chains such as Ruth’s Chris Steak House and Morton’s The Steakhouse also call Indy home—but with some local touches. At Morton’s, be sure to check out Peyton and Ashley Manning’s wine locker. Shula’s Steak House, tucked inside the Westin Hotel, is a great spot to catch pro football movers and shakers who descend on the city every year for the NflScouting Combine, in advance of April’s draft.

Sometimes it’s just a burger day, though, so I stop at The Capital Grille inside the ultra-luxe Conrad Hotel for a half pound of chopped sirloin blanketed in gooey havarti. With a burger comes an energy burst that demands immediate attention. How about firing up some power tools? Heck yeah.

A quick drive 12 miles south of Indianapolis brings you to the Marc Adams School of Woodworking, one of the largest hands-on woodworking schools in the world. A dizzying array of power and hand tools are available for creating your masterpiece, and weekend workshops are offered for those who can’t come for a weeklong class (though many do from all over the country).

A different kind of hand-eye dexterity is required at Fastimes Indoor Karting, Indy’s best speed shop outside a certain 2.5-mile oval that’s been hosting open-wheel racing for 100 years. Of course, you can’t just show up at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and expect to start driving laps right away. At Fastimes, however, you go from street car to race car in minutes, navigating a 900-foot, two-level track at speeds of up to 40mph. Champion drivers including Tony Stewart, Dario Franchitti and Mario Andretti have graced the track, which is all the man-validation I need.

Other sporty activities are also easy to find in the home of the Colts and Hoosier Hysteria. Downtown’s newest sports shrine, Lucas Oil Stadium, is available for public tours on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. I channel my inner Manning by scrambling on the turf and relaxing in the Colts’ locker room, then pretending to recreate it all as an announcer in the press box. C’mon, no one’s watching.

But basketball will always be the first sport of Indiana, from small-town high school games to the Final Four, which comes to “The Luke” in April. (Indy is home to the NCAA National Headquarters, so the city hosts many big-time college events.) Scoring a ticket to the Final Four isn’t easy, but walking just west of downtown to the NCAA Hall of Champions is. There, the 4,000-square-foot “Play Gallery” invites you to not only take some shots from a free-throw line, but also witness a nearly 100mph tennis serve, test your balance on a beam and climb into a downhill skiing simulator.

After sinking nine out of 10 shots from the line, I stop next door at the Indiana State Museum to pay homage to a 19th-century guy’s guy: Abraham Lincoln. Abe may be associated with Illinois, but Indiana was his home from age 7 to 21, and the museum pulled off a major coup in landing the world’s largest collection of the 16th president’s artifacts and documents. The Smithsonian wanted it; Indianapolis got it.

There’s plenty of room for history on my journey, especially the darker side. Notorious bank robber John Dillinger was born just west of Indy in 1903 and grew up in the area before embarking on his life of crime.

Imagining some of the steps he took while avoiding the law, I go on a Dillinger bar crawl through some of his alleged hangouts, including the Gaslight Inn, Dorman Street Saloon and The Vollrath Tavern. At the Vollrath, as the legend goes, Dillinger escaped capture via a secret stairwell to an apartment building behind the bar.

For some more history with a bonus shot-and-a-beer on the side, head downtown to the Slippery Noodle Inn, the state’s oldest bar, on South Meridian Street. Founded in 1850 as a roadhouse, it was once known as “Moore’s Beer Tavern,” though that had to be changed to “Moore’s Restaurant” for Prohibition (no matter, beer was still secretly made in the basement). Today, a Blues Brew—an IPA brewed exclusively for the bar at Bloom-ington’s Upland Brewery—is the drink of choice while savoring the live blues music.

Now it’s time for a more modern watering hole. Shooting back up Meridian, right off of Monument Circle, I find Nicky Blaine’s, a basement retreat that bills itself as Indianapolis’ premier cocktail lounge. After a perfect martini and a premium cigar later, I’m inclined to agree.

All of which, of course, make a man hungry again. Within the aforementioned downtown strip of great steak restaurants lies St. Elmo Steak House, a 108-year-old institution on South Illinois Street and Indy’s manliest hotspot. Sitting at the bar, I think about my day of close shaves, power tools and fast cars over the signature shrimp cocktail and its sinus-cleansing, horseradish-laced sauce and a cold one. I’m hoping to spot one of St. Elmo’s famous regulars: race car drivers, pro athletes and coaches—the kind of guys that prove Indy is America’s most macho city.

RED’S CLASSIC BARBER SHOP 22 E Washington St; 317-636-7337; www.redsclassicbarbershop.com
FOGO DE CHAO CHURRASCARIA 117 E Washington St; 317-638-4000; www.fogodechao.com
RUTH’S CHRIS STEAK HOUSE 45 S Illinois St; 317-633-1313; www.ruthschris.com
MORTON’S THE STEAKHOUSE 41 E Washington St; 317-229-4700; www.mortons.com
SHULA’S STEAK HOUSE 50 S Capitol Ave; 317-231-3900; www.donshula.com
THE CAPITAL GRILLE 40 W Washington St; 317-423-8790; www.thecapitalgrille.com
MARC ADAMS SCHOOL OF WOODWORKING 5504 E 500 North, Franklin; 317-535-4013; www.marcadams.com
FASTIMES INDOOR KARTING 3455 Harper Rd; 317-566-0066; www.fastimesindoorkarting.com
LUCAS OIL STADIUM 500 S Capitol Ave; 317-262-8600; www.lucasoilstadium.com
NCAA HALL OF CHAMPIONS 700 W Washington St; 317-916-4255; www.ncaahallofchampions.org
INDIANA STATE MUSEUM 650 W Washington St; 317-232-1637; www.indianamuseum.org
GASLIGHT INN 2280 S Meridian St; 317-782-1250
DORMAN STREET SALOON 901 N Dorman St; 317-237-9008; www.dormanstreet.com
THE VOLLRATH TAVERN 118 E Palmer St; 317-632-5199; www.vollrathindy.com
SLIPPERY NOODLE INN 372 S Meridian St; 317-631-6974; www.slipperynoodle.com
NICKY BLAINE’S 20 N Meridian St; 317-638-5588; www.nickyblaines.com
ST. ELMO STEAK HOUSE 127 S Illinois St; 317-635-0636; www.stelmos.com

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